Two years ago, almost to the very day, I shared with you "Arrivals N2" in my post titled "Bliss." I had just recently discovered Dustin O'Halloran after watching the movie "Like Crazy" and I was captivated. For well over a year, I listened to that soundtrack atleast once a day. It helped to fill the silence and the emptiness that I was coping with and adjusting to, and more than that, it helped me to feel once again. I found Mr. O'Halloran's music to inspire hope within me and with that hope came other feelings such as peace and happiness. Because of that, I cannot underestimate the role that this music has played in this process of mine in both healing and growing.
Tomorrow, Dustin O'Halloran will be playing here in New York City and I will be there to see him perform live. And I will not be there alone, I will be sitting beside and holding the hand of my New Yorker.
In yesterday's post, I wrote about how everything seems to make sense. I can see and understand how and why the sequence of events in my life have taken place. I took credit for most of what has happened by being an active participant in my life. However, I cannot take all of the credit. Call it luck, call it coincidence, call it what you like, but there are other factors outside of anyone's control that contribute as well. Those surprises are the spices of life. And timing... timing can be so crucial.
I was disappointed in the summer of 2012 when Dustin O'Halloran was last in NYC for a one night showing and I was out of town. I was disappointed for not following him to Chicago to see him perform. However, had I done that, tomorrow wouldn't be as special as it is going to be for me seeing him for the first time and after all the time spent with his music over the course of the past two years. What is going to make tomorrow even more special is that I will be sharing this night with a man who is just as excited about tomorrow as I am, but for the simple fact that by my bringing him, I am letting him in. He wants nothing more than to know me better and tomorrow he will get that.
The timing for this event could not be any more perfect. You see, this man that I call my New Yorker. He's more. He is My Amazing. I know that without a doubt in my mind. It's been my emotions that have hesitated. Only because moving forward, truly moving forward with someone means I need to let go of more. I feel that there is already so much that I have had to let go of and only a bit that is left. And it's hard. But he is patient and understanding and I know that once I can let go of the last bit of guilt and sadness that I feel for all of the happinesses that come with find one's amazing, then that's when the amazing will truly begin.
Maybe tomorrow will be that beginning.
Tomorrow, Dustin O'Halloran will be playing here in New York City and I will be there to see him perform live. And I will not be there alone, I will be sitting beside and holding the hand of my New Yorker.
In yesterday's post, I wrote about how everything seems to make sense. I can see and understand how and why the sequence of events in my life have taken place. I took credit for most of what has happened by being an active participant in my life. However, I cannot take all of the credit. Call it luck, call it coincidence, call it what you like, but there are other factors outside of anyone's control that contribute as well. Those surprises are the spices of life. And timing... timing can be so crucial.
I was disappointed in the summer of 2012 when Dustin O'Halloran was last in NYC for a one night showing and I was out of town. I was disappointed for not following him to Chicago to see him perform. However, had I done that, tomorrow wouldn't be as special as it is going to be for me seeing him for the first time and after all the time spent with his music over the course of the past two years. What is going to make tomorrow even more special is that I will be sharing this night with a man who is just as excited about tomorrow as I am, but for the simple fact that by my bringing him, I am letting him in. He wants nothing more than to know me better and tomorrow he will get that.
The timing for this event could not be any more perfect. You see, this man that I call my New Yorker. He's more. He is My Amazing. I know that without a doubt in my mind. It's been my emotions that have hesitated. Only because moving forward, truly moving forward with someone means I need to let go of more. I feel that there is already so much that I have had to let go of and only a bit that is left. And it's hard. But he is patient and understanding and I know that once I can let go of the last bit of guilt and sadness that I feel for all of the happinesses that come with find one's amazing, then that's when the amazing will truly begin.
Maybe tomorrow will be that beginning.
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