Friday, January 20, 2012

Organization = Happiness!?!

The Happiness Project focus for January is Vitality.  Vitality... to live, to develop, to endure.  I feel that this focus sets the bar for finding much happiness in this new year.  To feel alive, to grow, and to persevere are all omnipotent not only in living, but in living happily... well done Gretchen (Rubin).

One of the suggestions given to boost your energy, is to organize.  I wholeheartedly agree that feeling organized creates a sense of peace.  I have been trying to organize for months and months now.  When my husband passed, it seemed as though my apartment had suddenly become this monster of papers and stuff that I found to be suffocating.  I decided that I wanted simplicity in my life.  We had accumulated too much "stuff" over the years and it was time to let that all go.

It was not easy.  I first started with papers.  Funny, how in this technology age, the papers and junk mail still continue to pour in.  However, I have managed to sort, file, and shred.  I have even made shredding a task on my list of... "Daily Routines that Will Make Me Happier."  And you know what, it has.  I feel so much more organized in this area and it really has made me feel more peaceful and happier! 

My next big task, I actually did over the summer, and that was to go through our storage site.  Before moving to New York City, my husband and I had been married for six years, we had owned a home, we had alotta stuff.  We got rid of a good amount when we downsized from a big, old, single family house to a New York City apartment.  However, our plan was to eventually move out of city and into another house of our own, so we stored boxes and boxes of books from our library, a dining room set, garden furniture, etc, etc, etc. 

When he left, he took away that "dream" that was ours.  It was extremely difficult, but most of that "stuff" had to be let go.  Going through that storage site was like taking a walk through the past thirteen years of my life.  I kept things that were sentimental to me.  I kept things for my son that I felt represented his father in a way that I wanted my son to know.  The rest... I sold a bit at a yard sale, but the rest was donated to various charities.  Just this past week, the antique dining room set we had was given to a family that had just lost everything they had to a house fire.  So as hard as it was to get rid of my "life", it did feel good that most of it did go to places where it was truly appreciated and needed.  And I do realized that it was not my "life", only reminders of my past, my life with my husband. 

I also took on the daunting task of going through my husband's things.  I went through his dresser and his closet.  I did not do that right away.  But it was something that I knew would eventually have to be done and I decided that it was never going to be easy.  I did this on a day when my son was at day care and I had the apartment to myself.  I took my time, I reminisced, I cried.  I did it though.  It has been a few months since I did this, but I am glad I did.  I think if I hadn't, that task would have gotten heavier.  I have no regrets in getting rid of most of his attire and donating it. He would have wanted that.  And, if I wasn't sure about something, I saved it.  

I feel as though I have come off topic.  Although, I think what I am getting at is that I have been working on this January topic for quite some time now.  I know that everyone grieves in their own way.  Some people may be thinking I went through things and got rid of things too quickly, some may be thinking "good for you."  Some of you may be completely indifferent, especially if you have never experienced a great loss.  I tackled some of these hard issues rather early because I realized that everything that I did get rid of was really just stuff.  In the midst of rummaging through all that stuff, I did find my treasures (which I will share later). 

I know that I will have to work hard to keep myself organized, but after months of trying to accomplish this great feat, I finally feel like I have organized my things and my life in such a way that I do feel more comfortable and more at peace.  I feel like I am in a good spot now and with the close of this month, I will be ready to move on to the next chapter of The Happiness Project and my life.

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