It seems like an appropriate day to post this since in one hour, it will become August 3. August 3, 2002 was the day that I said "I do." It was a completely joyous day as I married the man that I completely adored. Tomorrow not only marks that is has been ten years since that happy day, it also marks the second anniversary without him.
Our marriage was not perfect by any means, but there was an enormous amount of love. My treasures... letters, cards, notes... that he saved from me starting from when we first met in 1997. I have my own stash of the same that I saved from him throughout the years and they are treasures as well. However, with my words (and I wrote so much and with so much detail) they bring me back to the moment. When I read them, they truly take me back 5, 10, even 15 years back and they allow me to relive the moments, the thoughts and the feelings. They remind me of the love and the happiness that we shared together in the most authentic and genuine of ways.
I mention very frequently about my quest to find something truly amazing. It is not that I feel I deserve it or am entitled to it. It is because I have known truly amazing. There were moments, many moments, when the cloud had lifted and my husband and I were just ourselves, and I experienced amazing. So I want amazing because I know that it does exist and I know what it feels like and I am not going to settle for anything less.
So this charm is not a representation of my husband or my marriage. It is a representation of my love. My husband and my life with him is connected to this in that I truly loved him and because my heart was with him, I found happiness, a treasure. My love for him did not die with him.
Some day, I will love again. It will draw from a different part of my heart, but it will be love pure and true to the very core. And with that, I will find another treasure to cherish.
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