I have never been a New Year's person. I always seem to get emotional, even when I was younger. I even hate those television shows about all the events that happened during the past year, I can't ever seem to get through them without some degree of tearing up.
For the longest time, New Year's Eve just became a day for me to be relieved that I, and everyone that I loved most, made it through another year. The new year was full of uncertainties and the unknown, and I just didn't like it. I didn't realize how bleak of an outlook that was until I told that to my best friend that last year, but I can't help but to admit that was how I felt.
Last year, I spent New Year's Eve with my parents. 2011 was not a good year and I needed for it to end. There was no reason to celebrate... I fell asleep before midnight as I just wanted the old year to end and the new to begin as quickly and as quietly as possible.
This year, today, I am not partying it up, however, I am actually looking forward to this new year. I no longer fear the unknown of what this new year will bring. I am actually looking forward to what this new year might just bring! I think one of the reasons for this change is the fact that despite everything, 2012 was a wonderful year for me!
I traveled... I took my solo trip to Las Vegas. I took a family vacation to the Adirondack's with my family. I went to California with my brother and son. I went to Connecticut with my son. And I took many little day trips around NYC and spent lots of time visiting my family during the summer and long weekends throughout the year. Right now, I am in the process of deciding if I want to take a cruise to the Bahamas with my son in March! I need to decide soon. I've also talked to my best friend about taking a girls' vaca this summer... I am so excited about that!
Connections... My closest peeps are still my closest peeps. But I have some new ones that have meant alot and I am glad that I have become closer to them. I even have a small group of people that are just outside of my inner circle and I appreciate having them in my life too. I am going to continue to keep good people in my life and I know that I need to work hard at being a good friend. I get too comfortable doing and being on my own. Hopefully having a dinner party next week will be a great start to the new year!
Mommy... I made it a whole year on my own! We made it through winter, spring, summer, and fall... a full school year of work, waking up early in the mornings, sick days, crabby days, fun days, travel days and all of the other wonderful days in between. I'm a single mom. I make mistakes. I love my son more than anything, and I can honestly say that he knows it. Every night when I lay down next to him to put him to sleep, he kisses me and tells me that he loves me and he falls asleep holding my hand. He melts my heart.
Another... I have put myself out there and it is quite the process. I have met lots of men and chatted with some interesting ones, but I did not go out on as many dates as I thought I would have. However, there is one that has stuck. I don't know what will come of it. But, part of what I like most about him is that I can stay in and enjoy the moment with him. I hope to enjoy many moments with him in this new year. However, whether its with him or someone else, I have to admit that I am looking forward to possibly not spending this whole year alone. I am ready to open myself up to more. I want to welcome a relationship back into my life.
Me... I found myself this year. My family, friends, experiences, therapy, this blog, reading, soul searching, stepping outside of my box... all of these things have helped me to find and define myself. This is the most incredible things of all. I feel good about myself and that has trickled into all aspects of my life... mommy, friend, finding new interests. For that I am truly grateful. And I can say that I am happy. I look forward to this upcoming new year and I can say goodbye to the old with a smile.
Happy New Year everyone. I wish all the best to all of you!
For the longest time, New Year's Eve just became a day for me to be relieved that I, and everyone that I loved most, made it through another year. The new year was full of uncertainties and the unknown, and I just didn't like it. I didn't realize how bleak of an outlook that was until I told that to my best friend that last year, but I can't help but to admit that was how I felt.
Last year, I spent New Year's Eve with my parents. 2011 was not a good year and I needed for it to end. There was no reason to celebrate... I fell asleep before midnight as I just wanted the old year to end and the new to begin as quickly and as quietly as possible.
This year, today, I am not partying it up, however, I am actually looking forward to this new year. I no longer fear the unknown of what this new year will bring. I am actually looking forward to what this new year might just bring! I think one of the reasons for this change is the fact that despite everything, 2012 was a wonderful year for me!
I traveled... I took my solo trip to Las Vegas. I took a family vacation to the Adirondack's with my family. I went to California with my brother and son. I went to Connecticut with my son. And I took many little day trips around NYC and spent lots of time visiting my family during the summer and long weekends throughout the year. Right now, I am in the process of deciding if I want to take a cruise to the Bahamas with my son in March! I need to decide soon. I've also talked to my best friend about taking a girls' vaca this summer... I am so excited about that!
Connections... My closest peeps are still my closest peeps. But I have some new ones that have meant alot and I am glad that I have become closer to them. I even have a small group of people that are just outside of my inner circle and I appreciate having them in my life too. I am going to continue to keep good people in my life and I know that I need to work hard at being a good friend. I get too comfortable doing and being on my own. Hopefully having a dinner party next week will be a great start to the new year!
Mommy... I made it a whole year on my own! We made it through winter, spring, summer, and fall... a full school year of work, waking up early in the mornings, sick days, crabby days, fun days, travel days and all of the other wonderful days in between. I'm a single mom. I make mistakes. I love my son more than anything, and I can honestly say that he knows it. Every night when I lay down next to him to put him to sleep, he kisses me and tells me that he loves me and he falls asleep holding my hand. He melts my heart.
Another... I have put myself out there and it is quite the process. I have met lots of men and chatted with some interesting ones, but I did not go out on as many dates as I thought I would have. However, there is one that has stuck. I don't know what will come of it. But, part of what I like most about him is that I can stay in and enjoy the moment with him. I hope to enjoy many moments with him in this new year. However, whether its with him or someone else, I have to admit that I am looking forward to possibly not spending this whole year alone. I am ready to open myself up to more. I want to welcome a relationship back into my life.
Me... I found myself this year. My family, friends, experiences, therapy, this blog, reading, soul searching, stepping outside of my box... all of these things have helped me to find and define myself. This is the most incredible things of all. I feel good about myself and that has trickled into all aspects of my life... mommy, friend, finding new interests. For that I am truly grateful. And I can say that I am happy. I look forward to this upcoming new year and I can say goodbye to the old with a smile.
Happy New Year everyone. I wish all the best to all of you!
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